Condemned Purity
by Ariyana
Summary: Kikyou meant well but the cruel hand of destiny had other plans for her soul. A collection of oneshots, ficlets and drabbles based on themes from livejournal community 30shards. [8 of 30]
1. Reminder

**Title:** Reminder  
**Character(s):** Kikyou  
**Theme:** #13 rain  
**Rating:** 13+  
**Word Count: **187  
**Squicks:** None  
**Summary:** Nature once meant something to her.

**Reminder**

She was free to love and free to hate. It was true she was able to experience emotions that she had to contain while alive, but all those emotions came with a price. The senses that she had taken for granted while alive were no longer there. Smell, taste and touch brought her no pleasure.

Simple things like the rain falling on her skin, the moist soil between her toes or the aromas of fresh grass and dew on flowers no longer made her senses tingle. Natural beauty held no meaning any more. Once upon a time she use to enjoy the rain. The cool water gently beating down upon her flesh, the smell of the salty fragrance dampening the air, the sounds of the rain soothing her like a lullaby and the rejuvenation it brought her.

Now the rain served as a bitter reminder of all she had lost. The rain now represented the truth. The truth that she stood out of time isolated from everyone and everything that once meant something to her. Revenge would be her only comfort now and she would embrace it.


	2. Sacrifice or Fate?

**Title:** Sacrifice or Fate?  
**Author:** Ariyana  
**Theme: **#21 hope  
**Genre:** Introspective  
**Rating:** 13+  
**Pairings:** implied Kikyou/Inuyasha  
**Word Count:** 299  
**Summary:** Is it selfish to hope when there are duties to be fulfilled?

She was never allowed to be selfish. It was her job to think of the greater good even if that meant sacrificing her happiness. An underlying sadness was always present but she was happy to protect and care for her people. The sacrifices she had made never really bothered her until she was given the greatest of burdens.

Only she could purify the jewel and protect it from evil. The jewel brought her many battles and even more troubles. Slowly the burden began to eat away at her. One day a certain half-demon walked into her life, causing her world to turn upside down. Originally she sympathized with him and maybe even felt a certain amount of pity for him. Neither one had expected to fall in love.

Would she ever get a chance to be selfish and do something for herself? She stared at the jewel for the longest time. How could something so small need so much attention? The Shikon no tama, the jewel of four souls…could be used for evil but could also be used for good. Wouldn't Inuyasha becoming human be considered good? If Inuyasha were human, they could be together. They could show their love for each other openly. No more veiled lies or fear of rejection to haunt them. She would be able to live as a woman with a loving husband and hopefully many healthy children. A dream that the priestess never dared to dream before Inuyasha entered the picture.

Somewhere along the lines she filled her people with hope but she had kept none for herself. Now her burden was the only thing that could make her dreams come true. Filled with a new sense of purpose Kikyou took the jewel from its altar and headed toward her meeting with destiny.


	3. Fortune

**Title:** Fortune  
**Author:** Ariyana  
**Character(s):** Kikyou and Urasue  
**Theme:** # 22 jewel  
**Rating:** 13+  
**Word Count: **100  
**Squicks:** Mentions of death.  
**Summary:** Fortune can be fickle.

The jewel…the Shikon no tama. It consumed her; she had to have that jewel every last fragment. She only knew of one source that had the ability to locate it. Kikyou, the fallen priestess but Kikyou was dead. The miko's status among the living was of little concern to her. The demoness Urasue had the power to correct that problem.

She would locate Kikyou's remains and revive the tragic priestess. The pure maiden who had once upon a time slain demons and protected the jewel from evil would soon be her tool, her shard detector. How fortuitous fate could be.


	4. Awaken

**Title:** Awaken  
**Author:** Ariyana  
**Character(s):** Kikyou  
**Theme:** # 8 revenge  
**Rating:** 13+  
**Word Count: **100  
**Squicks:** None really.  
**Summary:** Some grudges are so deep that they even survive death.

Fifty years had passed by the time she opened her eyes. She awoke to betrayal. Rage and pain flowed through every fiber of her being. It was not right what had she awakened too?

That wretched demon thought she had the power to control her. She had been resurrected by evil means but her soul would not be controlled. She was nobody's puppet or tool. She had not fallen so far from grace to allow such a thing to occur.

Rest was no longer an option. All debts must be paid. She had been betrayed; her betrayer had to die.


	5. Fixated

**Title:** Fixated  
**Author:** Ariyana  
**Character: **Kikyou  
**Theme:** #24 death  
**Pairing: **Naraku Kikyou  
**Rating:** 13+ Some Caution  
**Word Count: **100  
**Squicks:** Murderous thoughts  
**Summary:** Fixating is fixating whether it is the desire to kill or the desire to ravish.

He would not allow some pathetic mortal's foolish desires derail his plans. It would only be a matter of time before he acquired enough power to expel that wretch mortal's soul from his being. Once he was rid of Onigumo he would relish killing Kikyou again.

He would kill her slowly this time, so that he could see the look of fear on her face. That smug smile she taunted him with would be replaced with sheer terror. The past pain and suffering she had experienced would be a happy memory compared to what he had in stored this time.


	6. Support

**Title:** Support  
**Author:** Ariyana  
**Character:** Kikyou  
**Theme:** #16 friendship  
**Genre:** General/Drama  
**Rating:** 13+ Some Caution  
**Pairings:** platonic Enju/Kikyou  
**Word Count:** 179  
**Summary:** Sometimes we need help in order to keep our promises.

The young pottery maker who lived just outside the outskirts of the village sometimes found herself the subject of gossip.

"_She is so quiet…and young. How will she ever find a husband out there?_"

"_Maybe she thinks she's better than us._"

It was times like those she found it hard to keep her promise. She couldn't be like them…she wasn't "normal". The shadows of self-doubt would begin to plague her; the worries would start to get the better of her. That's when she would begin to contemplate breaking her promise, but then one of them would come bearing a gift.

The small soul gatherer would revitalize her and the doubts just seemed to melt away. A moment of calm would course through her. Just feeling her benefactor's presence in the distance was enough to give her strength to carry on.

Anytime the demons of self-doubt would haunt her; the priestess would come with support. Not much was said between them for their friendship was a series of gestures, the kind of gestures that keep friends on the right path.


	7. Vicious Cycle

**Title:** Vicious Cycle  
**Author:** Ariyana  
**Character(s):** Kikyou  
**Theme:** # 23 karma  
**Rating:** 13+  
**Genres:** Introspective  
**Word Count: **159  
**Squicks:** None really.  
**Summary: **Kikyou reflects.

Would things be different if she had asked questions? She was told the Shikon no tama could be use for good or evil but she never thought to question how such a power came to be. If she had known about Midoriko and the details of her demise would that had changed her fate?

Strange how this small jewel seemed to be the root of her problems, how it had bound her in a never-ending cycle. She dared to fall in love with an Hanyou, Onigumo dared to covet that which would never be his and they all suffered for their choices.

She died to fix her mistake, only to have her soul reborn and repeat her previous mistake. Kikyou had never asked questions and it seemed her reincarnated soul asked questions but rarely truly listened to the answers. Whether it was fate or stupidity that kept the cycle going, Kikyou was determined to see the jewel's karma end.


	8. Punishment

**Title:** Punishment  
**Author:** Ariyana  
**Character(s):** Kikyou  
**Theme:** # 3 fate  
**Rating:** 13+ Some Caution  
**Word Count: **100  
**Squicks:** None really.  
**Summary: **Kikyou watches.

She sees them from a far, darkness creeps over her eyes. She can't help wondering what life would have been like if Naraku had not tricked her. She wonders if she ever really loved Inuyasha or just the idea of him. She curses herself for being selfish.

She always knew that she was not allowed to live freely, but she foolishly tried anyway. Fate had a cruel way of dealing out punishments. One moment of weakness and now she had to watch while her reincarnation got everything and she was left with nothing. Yes indeed, fate certainly could be cruel.


End file.
